Steal These Laugh-Out-Loud Valentine’s Card Messages (and Still Say ‘I Love You’)
Valentine’s Day is just around the corner, and nothing says “I love you” like a thoughtful greeting card… with a side of humor. Our cards come blank inside because let's face it - nobody wants pre-written poetry from strangers. Whether you want to make your Valentine snort-laugh or swoon (or ideally both), we've got your back. Below, we've matched our favorite love-themed cards with messages that range from mildly amusing to "I can't believe you just wrote that" territory.
Unrealistic Valentine’s Day Expectations Greeting Card
“If there isn’t a flash mob, a skywriter, AND a string quartet, did Valentine's Day even happen? Thanks for loving my extra self!”
“Thank you for bring the only one who gets my definition of ‘reasonable.’“
“My perfect Valentine's involves a 12-course dinner, dancing under the stars, and a surprise trip to Paris. You know, just keeping it simple. I guess I'll wait till next year for all that... Thanks for embracing my dramatic side!”
I’m So Happy Our Orbits Crossed Greeting Card
“You must be a comet, because you light up my universe every time you pass by.”
“Our love’s gravitational pull is too strong to ignore.”
“NASA called - they want their stars back. I told them they're busy twinkling in your eyes.”
“Are you a black hole? Because I'm totally falling for your gravitational pull!”
“You must be the Big Bang, because you started something explosive in my heart!”
Gave You My Passwords Greeting Card
“You have all my passwords… and all my feels.”
“True love is sharing your streaming login.”
“They say sharing passwords is a security risk, but my heart has zero firewall when it comes to you.”
Let’s Worry About Debt Together Greeting Card
“Our love is like our credit score - only going up from here (hopefully)!”
“Our love is like our budget spreadsheet - full of unexpected surprises!”
“Who needs a 401k when we've got a priceless love?”
“Forget diamonds—nothing says forever like co-signing a loan together.”
Build Ikea With You Greeting Card
“I’d journey to the end of the IKEA maze for you.”
“Our love is stronger than Swedish particle board.”
“If our relationship can survive assembling a BILLY bookcase, it can survive anything!”
“Our relationship is like an IKEA manual - confusing at times, but worth figuring out together!”
Navigating Life’s Currents Greeting Card
“Thank you for doing all the paddling while I enjoy being your passenger princess.”
“You keep me afloat, even in choppy waters.”
“You're the paddle to my kayak, which means I'm basically useless without you!”
“With you at the helm, even white water rapids feels like smooth sailing.”
I Wheelie Love You Bike Greeting Card
“You've got me spinning head over wheels in love!”
“I wheelie, wheelie love you (sorry not sorry for the baby talk).”
“Is it wheelie cheesy if I say you make my heart spin?”
Love Is in the Air Heart Hot Air Balloon Greeting Card
“You’re the wind beneath my (hot air balloon) wings.”
“With you, every day feels like cloud nine.”
“You inflate my heart like premium grade helium!”
Teammate for Life Tennis Love Greeting Card
“Our love game is stronger than my backhand (which isn't saying much).”
“Thanks for pretending my serve is impressive.”
“You’re the doubles partner of my dreams.”
“You’re the only person I’d share the court (and my snacks) with.”
